Modern smartphones and apps provide numerous avenues for concealing infidelity, with cheaters increasingly utilizing features designed to erase digital footprints. Experts are warning of a growing trend dubbed ‘affair mode,’ where individuals leverage built-in and downloadable tools to hide secret communications and activities.

The Rise of 'Affair Mode'

Cheaters are now adept at using advanced smartphone capabilities to conceal their actions, making it more challenging to uncover evidence of infidelity. These tactics include hiding conversations, unexplained trips, and late-night encounters without leaving obvious traces.

Real-Life Experiences

Kerry, from Los Angeles, discovered her partner’s deception when she found hidden messages on his iPad after noticing entire message threads had vanished from his phone. “He deleted everything on his phone,” she said, “but he forgot about his iPad on the nightstand.”

The iPad revealed months of hidden conversations, including plans for secret meetups and restaurant visits. Her partner had also enabled disappearing messages in WhatsApp, a tactic becoming increasingly common among those engaging in infidelity.

Further investigation uncovered a shared Google Doc containing detailed plans, messages, and pictures between her partner and a high school friend. “It had everything… messages, plans, what they were going to do together, pictures,” Kerry revealed. “I sat there scrolling… It was all planned out, right in front of me. How could I be so dumb?”

Another woman discovered months of “dinner for two” deliveries through an app that remained logged in, unnoticed by her partner.

How Cheaters Exploit Smartphone Features

Relationship therapists and divorce attorneys have coined the term ‘affair mode’ to describe the use of smartphone tools that automatically delete messages, hide notifications, lock conversations with Face ID, conceal apps, and prevent location tracking. These features, initially intended for security and convenience, are now being exploited to hide illicit activities.

Detecting Digital Deception

Tech expert Kim Komando has highlighted these ‘affair mode’ settings and provided guidance on how to detect them on a partner’s phone. She notes that screen layouts may vary depending on the device and operating system, advising users to thoroughly search settings if options aren’t immediately visible.

Hidden Apps and Fake Calculators

Deceptive tactics include the use of fake calculator apps like Calculator Pro+, Calculator Vault, and Secret Calculator. These apps disguise themselves as standard calculators but require a PIN to access hidden photo vaults, private messaging, or call logs.

A large app size (over 30MB instead of the typical 5MB) or requests for access to contacts, the microphone, or camera are red flags. The ‘Hide an App’ feature, which obscures app icons and names, is another indicator of potential deception.

Location Tracking and Disappearing Messages

Built-in apps like Mail, Messages, Notes, Phone, Photos, and Safari can also be locked, requiring Face ID to open. Location tracking features, such as ‘Significant Locations & Routes’ on iPhones and Google Timeline on Android, can reveal a detailed history of a device’s movements.

Disappearing messages in apps like WhatsApp and Signal automatically delete conversations after a set period, leaving no trace. Experts warn that as technology evolves, cheaters will continue to find more sophisticated methods to conceal their activities, emphasizing the importance of vigilance and awareness.