53 Bizarre One-Night Stand Stories 'She kinda forgot to tell me she was married. Her husband showed up at the restaurant I was working at, looking for me.' I'm a Senior Staff Writer who writes a wide range of topics, spanning from people's real-life drama to pop culture to funny things I find on the internet.to tell us their most shocking hookup stories, and I could never predict the wild tales they were going to share. Here are the most interesting ones:"My friend picked up a woman at the bar, brought her home, and had a great evening. When he woke up, she was dead. Apparently, she had a heart condition that was aggravated by alcohol, and she was intermittent at remembering her medication at best." "I used to do stand-up and lived in an apartment next to one of the places I’d do open mics. I picked up a guy after the show and brought him home with me. We fooled around, and he got up to leave. I said bye and stayed in bed. A minute or two later, I still didn't hear my door close, but I did hear rummaging in my living room. I walked out, and he was standing there holding my PS3 in his hands, frozen like a deer in headlights. I asked, 'Are you stealing my PlayStation?' He said 'No,' then set it on the floor in the middle of my living room and left." "Pretty run of the mill, but she kinda forgot to tell me she was married. Her husband showed up at the restaurant I was working at looking for me. It didn't work out how he hoped because I'm a lot scarier looking than he is, so he left as soon as he found me.""I had one where I would have been happy to see her again, except the next morning, she went to leave and said, 'I texted my mom. She's cooking dinner on Friday, and I told her we'd be there.' I'm not even sure what your name is, and I'm already going to your mom's house for dinner? I ghosted her before ghosted was even a term people used." "I met a guy at a bar who was visiting friends from England and ended up going back to his friend’s apartment. We were just starting to fool around when the bedroom door flew open, and his friends started flipping out. Turned out they were all studying to be Anglican priests, and the apartment was actually in a house connected to the church, and the priest lived on the first floor. I quickly dressed and tried to leave but you couldn’t open the gate without a fob, so I was forced to walk back in to get them to let me out.""I went to this guy's place, but I was a bit tired, and so was he, so we decided to nap first. Then I'm woken up by police at his door. The dude was getting evicted by his roommates. They gave him time to pack, so he went and peed in the corner of the room. I went home and deleted the app we met on." "I met a woman in a bar one night, and we immediately went back to her best friend's place and started hooking up. The following day, as I’m saying goodbye, her best friend asked, 'Did she tell you that her husband is a minister?' I almost crapped myself. Then I said, 'Oh my god! I’m going to hell.'”"On Halloween, I went home with a guy, and ended up going down on him in his back seat. I woke up with him in my bed the next morning, got up, and went to work and ghosted him. About a week later, I went to an event for my parents' company; it turned out that the guy was my parents' coworker's son.""The first and last time. I was on a cruise 10 years ago and got with this guy. The condom got stuck inside me, and I started crying, thinking I was gonna die, get an infection, or get pregnant. I had to call my mother to ask her how to get it out." "I was considering sleeping with him and asked if he had any lube. He went and foraged around in his bathroom and came back with 'Dippity Doo' bright blue hair gel, and I got the hell out of there." "I met a hot, muscly Italian Guido guy at the bar and ended up at his house. It was amazing, perfect chemistry, but the next morning, I had horrible cramps, and I gave birth to my IUD on his bed, which he accidentally moved out of place during penetration." "We had a gap of 25 years. He said I looked like his mother, and he wanted me to call his name like his mom does when we do it. Nope, nope. Not a chance.""I hooked up with a woman, and the next day, I had to go to work, so I wrote a note and put my spare key on it next to the bed, hoping she would be gone when I got back. She was still there, and she had invited friends over for a party. I shut that crap down so fast and kicked them all out. Never saw that woman again." "I hooked up with a guy recently who was a little younger than me. He hogged my bed and started talking about his cryptocurrency the moment he woke up. We saw a cybertruck while I was taking him back to his car, and I made fun of it; he was like, 'Oh man, I think they're pretty cool.' That was nightmarish enough for me." "The night was fun, but the morning after wasn't. I was in her apartment, but she was asleep, so I decided to just sneak out. It was a big building that didn't really have any signs, so I got lost trying to find the exit. I ended up in the basement parking lot. The door behind me shut, and I couldn't get back in without a keycard. The shutters to the car exit were closed as well, so I couldn't get out that way. I was hot, thirsty, and hungry, and I really thought I was trapped. I almost had a panic attack. Luckily, I found a fire exit door hidden around the corner shortly after, but it really shook me." "He took off his cowboy boots and had NO SOCKS under, then proceeded to pet his cat with the sweaty, smelly feet. He then told me to pet her. No thanks, buddy." "I met this bartender on vacation. He asked me to meet him at a hotel the next night. He had a whole shaving kit and asked if he could completely shave me down there. The worst part is, I said yes! Strangest foreplay ever!""I hooked up with a woman in a bar, and we made out on the dance floor and in the car. She took me home, but her mother was there. It was a one-bedroom apartment. Her mom was in the bedroom, and when we sat on the sofa bed, her mom came out in her nightgown and reminded her that she still hadn't paid for her birth control prescription. She told me I reminded her of the sports guy on a local newscast and asked me if I had an older brother. She asked me if I was 'squeamish' about her being in the next room while I had sex with her daughter. I suddenly 'remembered' I had to get home to feed the cat and GTFO." "My friend went home with a guy late at night, they went into his bedroom but never turned on the lights. When he woke up the next morning, light from outside was streaming in, and he discovered the room was absolutely covered with My Little Pony stuff. Over 30 stuffed animals, posters, toys, even the sheets. He was completely surrounded by them. He left pretty soon after waking up and never called the pony guy again.""As we got going in the act, I felt a funny feeling in my belly, and then I proceeded to shart on the bed. I grabbed my clothes and ran like hell out the door, and never contacted him again.""I asked him to get some lube and he rummaged around in the bathroom and came back with NAIL POLISH REMOVER. I laughed so hard I nearly threw up and told him to go home." "I was picked up at a bar in Germany by a hot blonde German woman. I went home with her, and my buddy went home with her friend. They dropped us off at my woman's place. After an exhausting night of doing everything we could think of, I left her bedroom to take a shower, and lining her hallway were pictures of her American husband and three kids! Oops!" "I went back to my hotel room with a woman I had just met at the bar. We were having sex, and she told me she wanted to have my baby. I pretended to finish and went to sleep.""I was introduced to a nice lady by some friends. We had a nice evening out, and I ended up staying at her place for the night. I was woken up by her son, who I wasn’t aware existed, and he proceeded to ask if I was his new daddy. I left as fast as I could.""I was in college and met a woman while I was studying at a coffee shop. It was the middle of the day on a weekday. We talked a bit, and she invited me to follow her to her place. I had never done anything like this before, but she was cute, so I agreed. I followed her to McMansion, and when we got inside, she immediately started things. Just as it was time to get to it, she begged me not to wear protection or pull out. I just said no, and she stopped it. As I was leaving, her wife walked out and told me that they just needed my sperm.""I met a woman at a coworker's party. She lived a few doors down from them and asked me to walk her home. She invited me in. Her big house was totally empty of furniture, which I thought was weird. I should have left, but I went with it. We were mid-coitus when a 2 or 3-year-old kid walked in with a full, smelly diaper. Found out from a co-worker that she was in the middle of a terrible divorce and that she must have left the kid home alone for the hour or so she was at the party.""I was about 35 and was on a business trip in New York. One night after my conference, I went to a local bar, and it was pretty empty, so I sat at the bar. Not long after that, this really attractive 65ish year old woman sits at the other end of the bar. She bought me a drink, so I returned the favor and sat by her and bought her one. After a few drinks and conversation, she asked if I’d ever done a Sportsman Double. I told her no, and she explained it was a mother/daughter threesome. I was intrigued and buzzed. I figured she was hot, and her daughter was probably too, so I took her up on her offer. We got back to her place and told me to wait in the living room. She walked down the hall and knocked on a bedroom door, opened it, and yelled MOM I GOT ONE!!""Back in '94, on a second date after fooling around a little, I declined going further, citing my period. The next thing I knew, he turned in his seat, faced away from me with his feet on the ground. Then he pulled his jacket kinda up around his hunched-over position. First, I had zero clue what he was doing. Is he cold? Gonna puke? Next, he is bobbing his head into his lap. The freaking dude was going down on himself.""I hooked up with a guy on campus when I was 19 and in college. We had spent a couple of evenings hanging out before he came to my dorm room. There, we ended up hooking up after watching a movie. After we finished, the man CRIED. Like, literally bawling his eyes out. I couldn't believe it. So I told him to get up and move on.""I was maybe 21, and my friends wanted to have a fun girls' night, so we went to this bar. I saw this man who is maybe 30ish years old, and he made eye contact with me. I walked up to him in my sort of drunk state and started to flirt. Flash forward, we were in the bathroom hooking up when his WIFE walks in looking for him. They had gone to the bar for their 5-year anniversary.""I met someone on a dating app and after we finished hooking up, she asked if I needed to poop. I told her I didn't and asked her why she said that, and she said it was because she really wanted to wipe my butt. I couldn't have gotten out of there any faster.""I had a friend who went to a bar and met a woman. They were both drunk and ended up in bed together at her home, and after hooking up, she passed out, and he needed to use the restroom #2. He didn’t know where the bathroom was, and being extremely drunk, he found the kitchen trash can, did his 'business,' wiped with a dish towel, got dressed, and left.""I met this woman at a bar and went home with her. We got busy, and I found myself behind her doing it doggie style. She then ripped the biggest fart ever. The stench immediately hit me in the throat. I laughed so hard I got dressed and left. Totally gross!!!""I was incredibly drunk, of course. Right in the middle of it, he kisses me, and I begin puking in his mouth. I finished losing my drink over the side of his mom's bed. That's not all, I was so polite I rolled back over and asked if he wanted to finish.". I tried my best not to get distracted or disgusted by what was being shown on the TV, including multiple dead cats in a freezer, while we were doing stuff. About halfway through, I noticed small bloodstains on the sheets. He apologized and explained they were from the guy he had over the night before. Back acne. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough.""I was going down on a guy who had just graduated from the Naval Academy, and was quite drunk from celebrating. After what felt like eternity, he finished, and I sneezed at the same time. ALL of it, combined, came out of my nose onto his groin.""One time, this guy and I went to a hotel room to hook up. After we did, he started crying about how he missed his best friend and the dude she's dating is a major red flag and not right for her.""At a beach party, I met a dark, beautiful, very drunk woman, and we hit it off just great. She remarked that there are no real men there; let’s go back to her place. On the car ride, she was going down on me. When we got to her place, she opened the front door, and there was a guy sleeping on her couch. It’s her 17-year-old son. She wakes him up, and he goes to his room. I noped outta there so fast.""I went out with a friend, her husband, and a bunch of his friends. I ended up taking one of the guys home with me. A few of the people in our group got into a fight, and a bike cop pepper-sprayed them. I didn’t realize the guy I brought home had gotten mildly sprayed on his face, which he also touched with his hands. He wasn’t involved in the fight but was trying to pull people from our group out of the tussle. Needless to say, I ended up sitting him in my bathtub in cold water, and after I dropped him off back on the base the next morning, we never spoke again." "I met this cute guy on OKCupid and we got together. Dinner conversation is great, and I took him back to my place. The sex was fantastic. Afterwards, he stretched out sleepily and said, 'Oh wow, I’m suddenly sooo tired,' and cracked an eyelid to gauge my reaction. I was like 'Absolutely not. I’m driving you to the train station, and we can chat tomorrow if you want.' Well, he called the next day and asked if I wanted to be referred to as his girlfriend, partner, or something else. I said 'Oh, let’s pump the brakes. I had a great time, but maybe another date first before we talk about anything like that?'" "He agreed, and we proceeded to have a perfectly normal conversation. Then he called back a few hours later, hysterically sobbing and screaming that he knew he would be too much for me, and I can’t handle him, and I’m going to leave him. At this point, I’m sufficiently freaked out and pull the plug. I thought that was the end of it, but guess what? He called again SIX MONTHS LATER as if nothing had happened, and told me he’s moving to Queens, and maybe we should try again, as if the distance of him being in Brooklyn was the problem.""I had a crush on this guy forever, and he finally asked me out. He picked me up and we eventually ended up back at his house . One thing led to another, and we hooked up. Immediately after we finished, his parents came home! He hid me in his closet, and once he realized he couldn’t sneak me out through the house, he made me climb out his window, scale a fence, and meet him down the street. The ride home was silent. I never called him or answered his calls again. Oh, did I mention we were 17 and this was my first time having sex?!""Bartending and hit it off with one of the most attractive men I've met in my life. He lived half a block away. My best friend was a very protective man, and made 100% sure I wanted to go home with him. I did, and it was phenomenal. The next morning, he took me home. While I wasn't paying àttention, he stole my phone and jewelry. He then racked up $400 in international calls. Turns out it wasn't even his apartment...he was a hired house sitter from New York. Still almost worth it.""This was a Grindr hookup. He brought round nettles and asked me to sting him on his penis." "I had a one-night stand with a reasonably famous Estonian pop star. After sex, she ate so much sushi she threw up in her bed...with me in it.""I went home with a guy who didn't tell me he lived with his grandma. Twice I went for a pee in the night, naked, and the second time I realised she was sitting in the living room. She asked me very gently to stop leaving the bathroom door open afterwards, because the dogs kept getting in there!" "In college, I went home with a guy I met in a bar. I got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I found my way back to bed and went to sleep. Morning came, and I rolled over to look at the guy, only to see someone totally different. I had gone to the wrong room. The person I was in bed with had earplugs and was wearing a sleep mask. He was also in PJs while I was still nude. I tried to roll over and sneak out, but he woke up. I was just standing there, fully naked, with him staring at me in confusion. We have now been married for almost ten years and have two amazing kids."And finally,"When I was in the professional baseball minor league, traveling to an away town, I met a pretty lady outside in a motel hallway who invited me to her room. She had a horse saddle on the bed which she wanted to have sex on! We had a great time. Early next morning, there was a loud commotion in the hallway; it was the police and the FBI arresting the pretty lady as a multi-state bank robber!"