The $30 million emotional blindspot

According to a recent study, around 10 per cent of the population suffers from alexithymia , or 'emotion blindness',an inability to describe feelings correctly.

This phenoomenon affects not only those with alexithymia but also many others who struggle to name their emotions due to various reasons, including societal and cultural pressures, early experiences with caregivers, and genetic factors.

As a psychotherapist, I have helped scores of patients become more familiar with what's going on inside their heads, and it's a surprisingly common struggle.

Feelings and emotions begin as sensations in the body, processed by a part of the brain that doesn't have direct access to language.

In order to name feelings, we need to be able to consciously identify the physical sensation before using a different part of the brain to find the words to describe the feelings.

The 87 emotions we can't name

A 2021 book, Atlas of the Heart, surveyed 7,000 people over five years, asking them to list the emotions they could recognise and name, as they experienced them.

The average number of emotions named across the surveys was three: happy, sad, and angry.

However, the authors of the book determined that there are eighty-seven emotions and experiences that define what it means to be human.

The more accurately we can distinguish our feelings , the more effectively we can manage and navigate them.

For positive emotions, this clarity can help us recreate and sustain them, and higher emotional 'granularity' is strongly linked to greater well-being and positive life outcomes.

Why can't we name our emotions?

There are many reasons why we may struggle to name our emotions, including societal and cultural pressures to put on a brave face, a traditionally gendered view that suggests that particular emotions are masculine or feminine, and early experiences with caregivers and their emotional range.

Even if you don't suffer with alexithymia, there are many reasons why we may struggle to name our emotions.

To get familiar with describing what you're feeling, consider trying the Feelings Wheel, a visual tool that puts the topline emotions like happiness, sadness, and anger at the centre of the wheel, branching out to more specific feelings at the outer edges.

You could also try the Emotion Sensation Feeling Wheel, which works on the same principle but identifies emotions based on where you feel them in your body.

The Emotions Wheel can help you name how you are really feeling.

Learning the language of emotions is just like learning any other language.

Imagine going abroad and trying to communicate your needs without the language to do so.

You might be able to muddle through with basic words or even sign language, but it can make you feel more confident and in control when navigating your life to have the right language roll off your tongue!